I know I've said I think too much like four hundred million times, but.....
I think i figured out why i'm not good with relationships.
not only do i think too muc, i day dream and fantasize too much.
when i'm starting a relationship i fantasize the future and where the relationship might go and how good its going to be and so on and so forth. so a point roles around when the relationship is not the fantasy and when i've moved through the entire relationship in my head, its over. That's when the real one starts to fall apart.
so i need to learn to live in the real world in relation to other people and not to enclude them in my fantasy. i think it will make both places better, because their will not be any cross over.

Its funny how quickly after a relationship is over, you start to notice other guys again and not just notice a little. its like your man-finding sense goes into hyper-drive. Not that I feel i need to find someone, but i caught myself staring at this guys butt at work today - cute butt - and checking out guys on the street. Its so weird. I'm not in a hurry to jump into another relationship and i hope i'm not doing it to make my exboyfriend jealous or anything. its weird. i'm glad i'm heading back to LA for winter break. that will be nice.
on that note, i should start packing and stuff.