I've come to a point in this saga that is my life in New York as a writer still in school, where i've realized i have to return to LA on the 6th. Which is a terrifying thought. It will be nice to go back for my sister's birthday and all but I don't want to. I have a life here. the good thing is The Boy will still be here and i will still be involved with him, despite the non seeing. So I will fly away, with reluctance, but i'll be back.
The other giant question the returning to LA issue brings up is my blog. What am I to do about my blog? should it end when I leave? I haven't ever written anything from LA. Maybe I'll start a new one from there. It will be the next chapter of my life. On that note. I realize that there are probably a hundred loose ends to this story that i haven't wrapped up, most of which i'm sure i've forgotten. I suppose I should read through the whole thing and take notes on the thoughts that I left incomplete, but that's a lot of reading to do and i stil need to finish "On the Road". So, my motto right now is "One Step at a Time". It sounds kind of dumb, but it keeps me focused. And that's what I need right now. Focus. My life is so scattered, with finals and packing and everything. Well, i've got to get to work. That's another thing that's up in the air. I'm trying to transfer and I don't have a final answer on that. The one thing i've learned as experience the world more (a very sad thing) is that people tend not to meet my expectations. I'm continueously being disappointed. I try so hard to not expect anything and not ask things of people, but this trying to transfer thing is just re-enforcing that belief. I laid out all the information very neatly on a typed up sheet. I called the store I want to transfer to. I gave everyone dates and still no word. The last comment in relation to my transfering was "you can't transfer, if they don't have space." I checked. That was the first thing I did. Thank you very much. Just listen to me. I know my shit (not to sound pompous or anything.) Anyway, to work. But what can I expect from these people, they work at Barnes and Noble as a career. For me its a job, money and an experience. In no way I'm I going to make it a career. Well now i really have to go or i'm going to be late. signing off. peace.
BTW. Its Beltaine. More on that later.